Dear Cecilia,
It's been 3 years, 0 months, 10 days, and 12 hours since I last saw your face.
I've been seeing you all over these damp city streets. Everywhere I look there you are. Sweetly smiling Cecilia, sipping from a soda. I turn a corner, and slowly circling Cecilia is there, scampering along the sidewalk. Softly sauntering Cecilia, coming out of Saks with a scarf. Sexily sinful Cecilia seducing an older man on a street corner. Everywhere I look all I can see is a sea full of sadly stony eyes, silently succulent lips, and sprucely spindling legs stemmed from a sensationally slender waist. In a word, you. You. You are all I see. Oh, everywhere I look everything is just so serenely, sincerely, sublimely, stupendously, secretly Cecilia! And yet... you are nowhere to be seen.
You fade and melt like a scene drawn in chalk on a quickly dampening sidewalk. The cement, smelling of murky ozone and tainting the air with a metallic piquancy of blood and rain. Your deep gray eyes fade into the soft brown irises of some random passer-by. Your thinly pink lips dissolve into the collagen filled frown of some unknown stranger. Your legs, your waist, your hair, your hands, they all fade and morph and slip and dim into other people. People who aren't you.
Dearest friend, oldest companion, why does you haunt me so? If you can't be with me then, all I want is a life free of Cee. But no, strikingly spectral Cecilia will never let that happen. You always have to be what's on my mind. Not a day goes by where my thoughts aren't strictly controlled by Senior Staff Sergeant Cecilia and your army of memoria technica.
God damnit Cee, get out of my life and get out of my head. Wherever you are, stop tormenting me with ghosts.
Whether you're here or there, happy or sad, live or dead. I don't care.
I cannot live in this surreality any longer.
Please please please, leave me be.
Please please please, write me.
Your Friend,
~M~
